Living with an Alcoholic: What You Need to Know

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Living With an Alcoholic Spouse

AUD is a chronic (long-term) but treatable condition with available treatment options. Regardless of where the person with AUD is in their recovery or addiction, it’s important for loved ones to consider getting support for themselves. Alcohol use disorders are chronic conditions, but many people benefit from treatment and ongoing recovery efforts.

  1. Drinking may be a coping mechanism for your spouse due to a trauma they experienced in their youth.
  2. If you’re living with someone who has AUD, it’s important to understand what’s behind the addiction to alcohol and to learn how to cope.
  3. Consider seeking help from a domestic violence shelter or hotline.
  4. Approximately 10.5% (7.5 million) of U.S. children, aged 17 and younger, live with a parent diagnosed with AUD, according to a 2017 report.
  5. Their identity begins to revolve around that person and both people may form an unhealthy attachment to one another.

How To Cope When Living With An Alcoholic Spouse

Family members tend to adopt unhealthy roles within the family dynamic to help themselves cope with the stress of living with an alcoholic. Studies have shown that spouses of alcoholics are the most affected by their spouse’s addictive behaviors. Spouses of alcoholics can experience various emotional states, including guilt, shame, anger, fear, grief and isolation. Living with an alcoholic can cause anxiety, depression and poor self-esteem. There are immediate issues, like violence, stress, and worrying about children, How does alcohol affect your skin Long and short-term effects as well as lasting issues that cause harm for years to come. It is crucial to address and deal with the issue of drinking and to offer help but also to know when it is time to remove oneself from the situation for self-preservation.

Don’t Enable Their Behavior

If your alcoholic spouse is experiencing any of these health problems, seeking treatment may be necessary to avoid any life-threatening issues. Continually drinking alcohol can create these frequent health issues, leading to your spouse requiring potential around-the-clock care. If you live with an alcoholic spouse, you may find their drinking affects your life as well. To cope, you can help your alcoholic family member into treatment as well as learn when it’s time for you to leave the relationship. In couples therapy, the therapist helps the couple navigate the challenges that arise from addiction, facilitating open and honest communication. The focus is on developing healthy coping strategies, addressing underlying issues, and finding ways to support each other through the recovery process.

Living With an Alcoholic Spouse? You’ve Got 4 Options.

This could include seeing a therapist, putting physical distance between you and your loved one, or having a trusted friend to call when things get tough. Reach out today at and talk to one of our compassionate and knowledgeable admissions navigators. They can answer your questions, explain the treatment options, even verify insurance. Statements that begin with “You always…” or “You make it hard to…” are only going to make your spouse defensive. Instead, choose “I” statements to convey how you feel, such as, “I’m having a difficult time sleeping at night because of the late nights you’re keeping.” Be gentle, but be firm in your statements.

Leaving your spouse is a difficult choice, but above all you must keep your children and yourself safe. Ultimately, the goal is for your spouse to receive the treatment they require. According to the National Institutes of Health (NIH), the impact of alcoholism ripples through the entire family, causing distress among those of all ages. If your spouse is engaging in risky behavior, you may find your savings account depleted due to your spouse making erratic purchases or using the money to fuel their alcoholism. Keep in mind, too, that therapists typically don’t recommend couples counseling for relationships that involve any kind of abuse.

What Are the Signs of Pancreatitis from Alcohol?

Being able to drink a lot is seen as a sign of masculinity in much of the world. It also brings out different characteristics, such as dangerous driving, violence against both men and women, and giving them an excuse to ‘defend their honor’ if such an occasion presents itself. In addition to this, consider support groups or sober living options. There are therapy options as well as 12-step programs such as Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) or Al-Anon. This helpful tool lists rehab centers within the area where you can find professional help for your loved one.

Treatment options vary in intensity of services, length of treatment, and types of therapeutic interventions. Some of these treatment options may include inpatient treatment (such as residential rehabilitation), outpatient treatment, individual therapy, medications, and more. If your boyfriend is an alcoholic, or you have a partner with an alcohol use disorder, you probably wish there was something you could do to help them. With the appropriate treatment, your partner can make changes in their life to live alcohol free.

Living With an Alcoholic Spouse

Your doctors will help you take care of yourself and focus on your well-being and self-care. As the drinking problem persists, your spouse may become more violent or engage in risky behavior. For those of you living with an alcoholic husband, their drinking habits may lead to physical dangers such as domestic violence.

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